Note: This is just the start and there will be more to come.
25 million Americans visit porn sites a week, and in fact out of Internet searches 25 percent are for pornographic media. Is it any wonder sexual addiction is on the rise? Although sexual addiction isn't formally listed in the diagnostic statistical manual, it is nevertheless a very real and growing problem in the West that psychologists, sex therapists, and marriage counselors are increasingly confronted with.
How does pornography negatively impact us as a species? This goes back to evolutionary design. Our brains are adapted for primitive conditions when both food and sexual partners were a scarcity, and because of that, our mammalian brains react strongly to such opportunities. More specifically our dopamine is stimulated by things would increase the survival of both us as human beings, and our species at large and it manifests as feelings of desire. That's why a chocolate cake is much more exciting than the thought of carrots or sprouts and why the thought of finding a mate a top priority. However in today's world conditions have changed, with obesity and sexual addiction as an exclamation point to this fact. We have grocery stores, eateries, and convenience stores around every corner. And the world wide web has delivered an array of women willing to satiate any fantasy. But there are consequences for the hubris of such indulgence. Pornography isn't real, but the mammalian brain cannot distinguish the difference between a real partner and a simple Jpeg. Those who use pornography for quick relief find their frustrations quickly returning. As dopamine is stimulated on a particular sexual image or video, an inevitable numbed pleasure response will follow, leading a porn user to find new websites with new material, and often times with increasingly more explicit images. Is it any wonder how relationships crumble under the weight of porn addiction? Having something intimate and loving with a real partner becomes less rewarding when the brain is overstimulated with porn.
How do you know if you're addicted to porn or might have a budding sexual addiction? If you cannot go without porn for 2 weeks, you're hooked.
The passion cycle in action after orgasm in the context of relationships...
The passion cycle itself. As you can see, the highs and lows after orgasm are where all the uncomfortable feelings arise as a result of highs and lows fighting helplessly below the baseline.
A visual representation of why sexual addictions have become much more common these days.
Yesterday I had a really great chat with one of my best friends. We haven't actually spent time in quite a while, but we always seem to stay in touch, and he's really the kind of friend who's been there through it all. Catching up, he told me that was applying for jobs out West and then him and the family would be moving out that way, towards California. He's mentioned this sort of thing to me before, but I never really thought he'd leave. I mean, I hear the words, but you never really comprehend that until it's around the corner. I burst into tears then, in all my sadness and appreciation of who he's been in my life, I was ridiculous in that moment. And as nice as he is he's all saying he should have mentioned this more gently and that at the moment he's not going anywhere, and it's true, I am a little sensitive, and sometimes a bit of a crybaby.
I was really thankful for this though because it made me really realize what wonderful people I have in my life and to always be mindful of that no matter what, and some people are not as lucky for that. ❤
I was responding in a TQC forum recently and I came across a kind of getting to know you survey. If you've done this already you don't have to respond again, but otherwise feel free to leave a comment. Let's all get to know each other even more! K! ^_^
Hello everyone!
Name: Katherine! Approximate age: 27 Male or female: Female Fave colour: Aquamarine Fave animal: Cats, Dolphins Fave food and drink: Lemons, Pomegranate Juice Fave movie / TV shows: Kill Bill, Better Off Ted, Ringer, Golden Girls Fave actor (male and female): Sarah Michelle Gellar, I think she's so pretty! Fave music / band: I am a jazz / downtempo lover. I like Sneaker Pimps, Portishead, that kinda stuff... Celebrity Crush: Justin Timberlake ^_^ Which five people (Dead or alive) would you invite to a dinner party and why? I wouldn't want to invite dead people to my dinner party, that would be - awkward to say the least... and smelly! Although Spike from Buffy is technically dead, actually undead. Can I invite him? Yeah, I'll invite Spike and my friend Lindsey, my best friend Emily, Kelly... haven't had mochas with her in a while, and Thai anddddd... that's it. I have five people now! Who would you like to see banished to a deserted island with nothing but crabs and mosquitos? And no way to build a raft to get off said island? The guy who defrauded me out of $3,400, that scuzzbucket deserves to have the book thrown at him. Plus face my race of evil demented mutant supercrabs! HA!
I can't sleep. I believe that Full Throttle really did me in. I notice I've kind of become addicted to writing recently. Maybe that's an entry for another time. In the time I would like to talk about something very important... Kill Bill. Yes, I know, this is old news. It's an old movie by now, but up until about a month ago I had never seen it! Fun trivia huh? Well, it has easily become one of my favorite movies. I had seen only two Quentin Tarantino films before this, Jackie Brown and Pulp Fiction respectively. Both of them had a very unique quality about them, but when I saw Kill Bill, from the very first red eye scene I knew I was about to be blown away. Kill Bill is over the top, very anime-esque. Which I hear was the whole point of it. So here are just a few notable scenes that really stuck out to me... starting from Beatrix' visit.
An evenly-matched battle finally reaches a stalemate when a school bus stops in front of the Pasadena home. Suddenly things become more complicated, for Vernita... her daughters early return from school changes nothing for Beatrix, her mission of revenge is borne of grief for her unborn child, something for which Vernita is ultimately culpable.
After a brief pause they continue discussion in the kitchen. Vernita makes an appeal to her emotions, a plea for life on behalf of her daughter, however, Beatrix remains unmoved.
Beatrix: Bitch. You can stop right there. Just because I have no wish to murder you before the eyes of your daughter does not mean that parading her around in front of me is going to inspire sympathy. You and I have unfinished business, and not a Goddamn fucking thing you've done subsequent in four years including getting knocked up, is going to change that.
Failing to secure sympathy from the Bride, she excuses herself from the heated exchange to fix her daughter Nikki some KABOOM cereal. After a few quick verbal jabs between former comrades, Vernita quickly grabs the box of cereal and fires a shot at Beatrix, only to miss and receive an impalement from a thrown knife for her effort. Quentin Tarantino captures the brutality of this scene perfectly. The faint sound of birds are muted with the mechanical crunch from the scattered cereal on the floor, as Beatrix advances towards her kill, finally kneeling to reclaim her knife. The Bride stands above her adversary, victorious, nearly stoic, only to discover moments later that Vernita's young daughter Nikki has witnessed her mothers murder, blank from shock. This is not how she wanted it to go. And in that moment, suddenly the revenge she sought which was so clear to her, even justified, was now questionable. She now finds herself in an uncomfortable grey shade of a moral dilemma. Turning away, Beatrix wipes her weapon vigorously, removing the blood from her hands like the Lady Ophelia. She apologizes by saying it was not her intention to do this in front of her and for that she is sorry. But to take her word that her mother had it coming, and when she grows up, if she still feels raw about it... she'll be waiting. This also sets up the story of Kill Bill 3 which is coming to theaters in the near future in which Nikki will take her revenge upon the Bride. An eye for an eye clearly doesn't play out too well and the fallout is demonstrated unequivocally.
Although Vernita is to be slain second according to her kill list, Oren Ishii is the next shown to be targeted by the Bride, typical of Tarantino's style of non-chronological portrayal. Oren's entrance at the House of Blue Leaves is one of the best character appearances I've seen.
Out of all the assassins that the Bride would face, Oren Ishii's character was one that elicited the most amount of pathos. She was the most victimized by her circumstances, witnessing the slaughter of her family at the hands of a ruthless Yakuza Boss at only 9 years of age. At 11, she swore revenge against the man responsible for the death of her family, chiding him to look into her eyes before completing the final blow. It was the point of no return for her.
During the duel between Beatrix and Oren Ishii, Oren lands a slashing blow to the combat-worn Bride, falling in the show, taunting her. Oren promises that even if she cannot fight like Samurai, she can at least die like a Samurai. Beatrix finally struggles to her feet and commands Oren to attack with everything she has. Oren brings down her sword and is deflected. As their swords clash once again Oren backpedals away from Beatrix, a bloody wound surfaces through her robe. Oren, now softly gasping for her breath gazes upon her opponent with respect. Much as she was the victim of tragedy herself, so was the woman standing before her, and yet she visited the same fate against her four years ago at her own wedding. She apologizes for ridiculing her earlier. The bride looks in understanding, and accepts, asking "Are you ready?" Oren acknowledges her fate. She knows she's going to die here, and so she beckons her to come. The momentary truce passes as the two warriors rush towards each other, bringing their swords together and away again. And so the Bride stands victoriously once again.
The least likable out of all the assassins by far is is Elle. There isn't a shred of any redeemable quality at all in her. Formerly known as part of the Deadly Viper Assassination Squad by her code name California Mountain Snake. She is cunning, opportunistic, and self-possessed in her schemes and won't hesitate to kill all who stand in her way. After Budd captures the Bride and contains her within a wooden tomb underground, he informs Elle of this and that he also is in possession of the Bride's Hanzo sword. They strike a deal, one million for the sword. She would travel to El Paso the next day to meet him.
When Elle arrives Budd opens the suitcase and begins counting, but unbeknownst to Budd, there is an unfortunate surprise waiting for him. Sorting through dead presidents, wrapped and folded he reveals none other than a Black Mamba snake. Budd is bit in three quick strikes before throwing the suitcase away from him scattering the money over the trailer. Panicking as the poison quickly takes effect, Budd falls to the floor helplessly. Elle looks down at him and expresses her regrets for skipping the introductions.
Elle: Mmm. I'm sorry Budd. That was rude of me wasn't it? Budd, I'd like to introduce my friend the Black Mamba. Black Mamba, this is Budd.
Elle takes a seat and pulls out a detailed list of facts about the Black Mamba as well as answering Budds earlier question more thoroughly.
Elle: Right at this moment, the biggest "R" I feel is regret. Regret, that maybe the greatest warrior I have ever met, met her end at the hands of a bushwackin', scrub, alky piece of shit like you! That woman deserved better.
With his last breath, Budd finally succumbs to the poison coursing within him. Elle begins gathering the cash back into the suitcase but not before breaking the unfortunate news to Bill.
Elle: Bill...Elle. I have some tragic news. Your brother's dead. I'm sorry baby. She put a Black Mamba in his camper. I got her, sweety. She's dead. Let me put it this way. If you ever start feeling sentimental, go to Austin, Texas. When you get here, walk into a florist and buy a bunch of flowers. Then you take those flowers to Huntington cemetery on Fuller and Guadalupe, look for the headstone marked "Paula Schultz", then lay them on the grave. Because you will be standing at the final resting place of BEATRIX KIDDO.
With the hanzo sword in her hand, Elle kicks open the door to leave to find who other than the Bride herself.
A long and brutal battle begins, however, Beatrix' surprise entrance allows her to quickly gain the upper hand. As the battle unfolds Elle is afforded a couple of moments to use her sword, only to find that she doesn't have the room remove it from its scabbard. With her fierce unarmed fighting skills, she strikes an even keel with the Bride. At one point, Elle knocks Beatrix down with a vicious hook punch to her face, who then retaliates by taking possession of Budd's guitar, swinging and smashing it down again as Elle dives behind the kitchen counter to retreat. Quickly darting in pursuit, the Bride is repelled with a leaping kick. Staggering backwards, Beatrix crashes into the living room couch as Elle seems ready to finish the fight, launching into a flying kick. In just the nick of time the Bride quickly sidesteps, using her momentum to send her crashing through the bathroom wall. Taking Elle in the firm grip of a choke, the Bride seizes control, inching forward and uses her leverage to dunk her head first into the toilet bowl. With swift presence of mind Elle uses the flush valve, allowing her another few life-sustaining moments. Catching her breath, she summons her strength and lands an elbow strike to Beatrix' groin, now quickly retreating to the opposite end of the trailer to retrieve the Bride's Hanzo sword. Luckily for Beatrix, she notices Budd's own hanzo sword nearby.
The two warriors stare down across the narrow corridor for the inevitable face-off.
Elle: What's that? Beatrix: Budd's hanzo sword. Elle: He said he pawned it. Beatrix: Guess that makes him a liar, don't it?
Elle winces in frustration. Had Budd's revelation been true, she would have a decisive advantage over the Bride. She implores Elle on just what she said to Pai Mei (both Elle and Beatrix's master) to make him pluck out her eye.
Elle: I called him a miserable old fool. Beatrix: Ooh, bad idea. Elle: Know what I did? I killed that miserable old fool. And I told him that the words of a miserable old fool like you is worth less than nothing. That's right. I killed your master, and now I'm going to kill you, with your own sword no less. Which in the very immediate future will become my sword.
Enraged, Beatrix makes her final point strenuously.
Beatrix: Bitch... You don't have a future.
Screaming her battle cry, Elle clashes her katana with the Bride. Any loss of footing would mean the end. She maintains her footing as Elle presses against her with firm intensity, only looking up to acknowledge Elle's cold gaze. What happens next I'm sure Elle didn't see coming... Much as Pei Mei did for her insolence, the Bride plucks out Elle's left eye. Collapsing and now completely blind, Elle screams, pleading and swearing vengeance. Beatrix turns to leave, crushing her eye under her foot. Elle is left to fend for herself, along with the Black Mamba she had planted for Budd, hissing as she exits the trailer. The bride now departs to face her final adversary and complete her final objective. Kill Bill.
I will say that I didn't set out with the intention of doing a character analysis in this entry, I was originally going for something like: I highly recommend this movie, it's a definite gem, that sort of thing. But it was fun. Quentin Tarantino is a genuine master of impressive visuals, over the top scenarios, and intense dialogue. So anyways, that's my entry. I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing about it.
I just woke up. Every morning it is the same though. Often, I am too tired to drag myself out of bed. The scoliosis I have is a real energy drainer. At 22 I was diagnosed with it when my oh so tactful orthopedic specialist placed two X-Rays in front of me. Pointing to the left he said, "this is a normal spine"... pointing to the right now, "this, is you".
Me: Oh.
48 degree curvature in my spine. Yeah, it was an awful day for me. My doctors theorized it must have all started taking place when the routine check-ups in school stopped. I can go through my days and be relatively OK , but mornings are the absolute worse. I am so tense and in pain then, and I hate it. I used to go to the local Chiropractor for it, but it got too expensive. Although the physical therapy side was nice, it helped. I even got massages on the really bad days. I need to do something about this again. Maybe a shiatsu massager? Or maybe a shih tzu?
Ringer was and still is one of my favorite shows. Not only was it a moving drama, it was a constant twist of suspense, full of surprises. Unfortunately Ringer was cancelled in its first season, which is too bad because it had so much more potential that could have been used in Season 2. Luckily enough for me I stumbled on to some Ringer Season 2 Fanfiction! I usually don't dabble in fan works, but I really want to know what happens between Andrew and Bridget, will he decide to forgive her? What's in store for the inevitable show-down between Bridget and Siobahn? What happens to Henry? What happens to Martin Charles? Ahhhh! So many questions!
One day, a scorpion looked around at the mountain where he lived and decided that he wanted a change. So he set out on a journey through the forests and hills. He climbed over rocks and under vines and kept going until he reached a river. The river was wide and swift, and the scorpion stopped to reconsider the situation. He couldn't see any way across. So he ran upriver and then checked downriver, all the while thinking that he might have to turn back.
Suddenly, he saw a frog sitting in the rushes by the bank of the stream on the other side of the river. He decided to ask the frog for help getting across the stream.
"Hellooo Mr. Frog!" called the scorpion across the water, "Would you be so kind as to give me a ride on your back across the river?"
"Well now, Mr. Scorpion! How do I know that if I try to help you, you wont try to kill me?" asked the frog hesitantly.
"Because," the scorpion replied, "If I try to kill you, then I would die too, for you see I cannot swim!"
Now this seemed to make sense to the frog. But he asked. "What about when I get close to the bank? You could still try to kill me and get back to the shore!"
"This is true," agreed the scorpion, "But then I wouldn't be able to get to the other side of the river!"
"Alright then...how do I know you wont just wait till we get to the other side and THEN kill me?" said the frog.
"Ahh...," crooned the scorpion, "Because you see, once you've taken me to the other side of this river, I will be so grateful for your help, that it would hardly be fair to reward you with death, now would it?!"
So the frog agreed to take the scorpion across the river. He swam over to the bank and settled himself near the mud to pick up his passenger. The scorpion crawled onto the frog's back, his sharp claws prickling into the frog's soft hide, and the frog slid into the river. The muddy water swirled around them, but the frog stayed near the surface so the scorpion would not drown. He kicked strongly through the first half of the stream, his flippers paddling wildly against the current.
Halfway across the river, the frog suddenly felt a sharp sting in his back and, out of the corner of his eye, saw the scorpion remove his stinger from the frog's back. A deadening numbness began to creep into his limbs.
"You fool!" croaked the frog, "Now we shall both die! Why on earth did you do that?"
The scorpion shrugged, and did a little jig on the drownings frog's back.
"I could not help myself. It is my nature."
Then they both sank into the muddy waters of the swiftly flowing river.
Self destruction - "Its my Nature", said the Scorpion...
shocked